With the first month of this year closing today and the Chinese New Year of the Wood Horse beginning, I've been thinking about my progress so far... Well. If January is any indication, then 2014 is going to be a WILDLY successful year! Here are my Top Ten Successes so far: 1) For 2014, I've been asked to speak at two local networking events, one virtual training program and one live event ~ in Lisbon!
2) I've already successfully co-hosted one live event, Fears to Fierce with Marsha T Danzig on Cape Cod, with another coming up, Everybody Loves Lola with Angel Quintana in Orlando, FL in February
3) I've been asked to join the Board of Directors for Dressed for SuccessCape Cod PLUS develop an ongoing talk series with my pal Marsha called Say YES!
4) I've been asked to teach a juicy new virtual training program with Angel Quintana for her NEW Willow House of Design PLUS act as a judge for her Origami Awards
5) I took the leap and started working with Angel on my signature system and website redesign, with my beautigorgeous new logo, tagline and awesome free offer already rolling
6) I fit into a size smaller dress thanks to my regular yoga practice since October
7) I've choreographed and taught more than half the show that's opening in March, called What the World Needs Now: A Burt Bacharach Review at Cotuit Arts Center
8) I happily passed the one year mark with my man, Marc and witnessed him realize his dream of becoming an artist when he sold his first limited edition print
9) I've witnessed my daughter Celia progress from bored 7th grader to excited mostly 8th grader; she'll probably jump right to high school in the fall!
10) I successfully avoided a disastrous car accident by trusting my gut
Bonus: I've said no to several things that no longer move me forward in order to say YES and make space for more amazing happenings.
My dear friend and workshop co-leader, Marsha T. Danzig has been saying this lately: Sometimes when we say NO it really means we are saying YES ~ to our Selves.
Often, we don't realize how many obligations pile up and bury us under the weight of should, ought, need, have to... But let me ask you this: Do those commitments truly serve you, your loved ones, your clients and/or your business? Do you feel good about your commitments (most of the time) or does the very thought make you miserable?
I know it's hard to imagine, but many of our shoulds and supposed tos are truly Self-inflicted and probably not even necessary. Just stop and think about it for a moment. What obligations are you fulfilling out of a sense of duty or habit? Which shoulds were thrust upon you without your permission? How much guilt did you accept with that burden you grudgingly accepted?
Your shoulds could be masquerading as necessities, so watch out. Are you doing things for people without any return, without even any satisfaction? Don't get me wrong, it's great to be generous and do things selflessly, absolutely. But if we overextend our generosity and stretch our selflessness to the point of forgetting about our Selves, that's when the alarms go off. That's when we start getting sick, or feeling exhausted, or resentful. That's when we get cranky and snap at our loved ones. Yeah... Been there, done that.
When this starts to happen, like it did for me in December, it's time to start cutting things from your life. You must take action. Deadweight must be thrown overboard! Not just to save your sanity (though that is actually kinda super important!), but also to free up time and energy for more satisfying and possibly productive or lucrative endeavors. Here's what I did:
- I chose to skip sending Christmas cards completely this year. I did not even send out digital ecards. !!! Horror of horrors, I know. When I mentioned the very idea of ecards instead of the handwritten paper kind just before Christmas (when my head was spinning on its axis and about to pop off from the stress of too much to do!), I got a lot of comments ~ very polite comments, thank you! ~ about the benefits, value and even necessity of sending the paper kind. Okay, I know it is very nice to send and receive the paper kind. But honestly, faced with the prospect of watching my body stand there in confusion while I (alone in my head) roll away after popping off my axis, well, I chose what I chose. No regrets. BENEFIT: More time, more sanity, less stress.
- I chose not to continue my membership in an online community that has been a HUGE part of my life for the past two years. In those two years, I learned so much and made so many strong friendships and connections. That community had a ginormous influence on lifting me to expert status and I am forever grateful. But it's time for me to explore new possibilities and adventures. I'm ready to spread my wings and see what else is out there! BENEFIT: More time for new groups and for unlimited monthly yoga!
- My whole family came down with nasty colds on Christmas so we were basically house bound for a few days. You know what? It was the best thing that could have happened for me! For close to two weeks, I let go of my strict routines and schedules, including social media posts, workout schedules, healthy eating mandates, cleaning and laundry routines, sleep habits... I just kind of let my mood guide me and did things whenever I felt like doing them. I only went to yoga class like, twice. I slept and napped. A lot. I ate chocolate! It was soooo yummy! It felt soooo good to relax. And I still fit into a size smaller dress a couple of weeks later. BENEFIT: So much relaxation that I could not wait to get back to working and creating!
- I took a week off from writing my blog! THAT was really hard as I've been writing my weekly blog for over two years now. It's a commitment I take very seriously for my business and my clients. But I had kind of hit a creative wall. That told me I needed a break! So I took a week off. =) BENEFIT: Same as above. Creating like mad now!
As you can see, shedding a few commitments that were no longer beneficial gave me huge new benefits for the New Year. Sometimes, it's best for our bodies and souls when we shed some old commitments like shedding winter skin. What commitments no longer serve you? Which ones can you shed today? Post in the comments below, I'd love to hear more about your successes!
© 2014 Pamela Wills Coaching, Int'l
Your Speak with Confidence Coach Pamela Wills teaches business women around the globe how to Turn on the Charm, Fight the Fright!TM and overcome fear of public speaking to grow their success and positive impact. Get her FREE audio badass teleclass, “Ten Ways to Spice Up Your Branding, Boldness & Bank Account” at www.PamelaWills.com.